ambiguity.

"Welcome back" he yells, as lonliness grabs me by my wrist and forces me into a dark cold room I have become all too familiar with. My cries for help have been ground down to a mere whimper. I no longer clammer for footing or a place to rest my weary bones. I know the drill so I brace my body with my back against the wall, let my legs go limp like noodles, and surrender to the slump. At least with the abandonment of being on the floor I know my position. No ambiguity. I hold no value to those I loved so deeply. What sin must I have committed that would sentence me to a lifetime of abandonment? Was I born to this fate or did I earn it with misdeeds? I pray for eternal slumber.