"With each new person you meet, you are being told something about your purpose in life and what you are here to learn." -James Van Praagh

wisdom.delerium.

To others the pain was obvious The colours of shame a bruise - unjust
Abuse of trust can't be wiped
I can't remember why I chose to say goodbye I'm terrified of what I
Might have severed
I tried to forget the drowning truth Lashing inside my sea of youth
Life seemed a fair sacrifice for peace
I can't remember why I chose to say goodbye I'm terrified of what I
Might have severed
I ended up too high But never learnt to fly
So coming down I'm very thankful (you were there)

morning.mourning.

Like in the horror movies where the town begins to shut down and board up the windows as the sun begins to set I feel the sadness coming long before it hits.  When the sun starts to go down I frantically try to makes plans for the evening that will keep my mind occupied.  At night I feel sadness but the birth of a new day as the sun rises the next morning always brings new hope and happiness. 

Aaliyah.

Twelve years ago today the world lost a beautiful and talented individual.  I was driving past Dixon High School just outside of Jacksonville, N.C. when the radio DJ announced that Aaliyah's plane had gone down.  I had to pull off the road to endure the shock and sadness.  I had been dressing in drag for a few months already and going by the name Eve Campbell.   It was at that moment that I decided to change my name to Aaliyna Dejah Campbell.  Aaliyna in memory of Aaliyah and Selena.  Dejah is a beautiful friend of mine that I admired then and still do today.  Shortly after the passing of
Aaliyah I took my character from the streets to the stage and dropped the last name Campbell.  Years later I simplified the spelling of the first name to "Alena."  RIP Aaliyah Dana Haughton.

addiction.

"You're an addiction ... a favored vice for many" was said to me this morning by a friend.  The feeling that overcame me was loneliness but immediately shifted to pride.  I would rather be someone's addiction than someone easily forgotten.